And breathe new life into these bones

You know that feeling that you are about to overflow, that feeling of being overwhelmed and filled to the brim with tears, that at any point could seep out and expose your weakness? Well that's where I'm at and it's where I've been at for most of the day. Sometimes it hits you like a ton of bricks. Knowing that the child in my arms is starving and her clothes are torn up and dirty, knowing that her daddy never comes home and that she shows signs of abuse that would be redflagged in any kindergarden back home, but then knowing that it may not get better, knowing that she might live like this her whole life, knowing it might get worse... Well, that kills me, it angers me, its sadens me.

We are working to get a feeding program in place and running and it's a project that takes time and patience, but once it's in place, the kids at el gorrion school will receive a substancial, formal snack everyday. Nutrtion classes are in the works and cooking classes to teach parents About the effects of eating only tortilla an beans, to help them learn to mak other foods that will provide more nutrtion. Vitamins are now in all the classrooms and there will hopefully be some improvement. El gorrion, thanks to pastor Mario will now have running water for the first time since they were relocated there after hurricaine Mitch 11 years ago and that is truly going to make a huge difference. But the homes are still broken, poverty is present here in a very real way. There's enough food and money on this planet to feed everyone, solving world hunger is not imposssible...we need to be outraged and constructive because its not okay.

We visited a home today. All the children were unwell, but the smallest one was the worst. He lives in a home with 17 other people and he is very sick. He has respitory problems and anemia that is so severe, if left untreated will turn into leukemia. His family cannot afford medicine or food to make it better an I know that once the problem
escalates for that child, there will be even less that can be done. Now some si staff are working to provide some care for him but it shakes me to know that a problem so easily fixable could lead to a death here because of poverty and hunger...that this 5 year old boy may have a shorter life because there wasn't enough money for vitamins. This is just one of billions of cases like this world wide and that fact alone makes me desire change, makes me unablen to ignore what I now know.

Come and break this heart of stone

Maybe a dance or painting or poem or music might stand a chance at speaking the beauty of the souls here but words certainly cannot. I have fallen deeply in live with Guatemala and I want more than anything to bring pieces of it home with me. I don't mean souvenirs or fashion items, but an attitude. Relationships with God and with people stand as the most important things here and the people here pour their love and time into eachother. People will stop to ask you how you are and they mean it. Problems like having a hard time being loved in a normal way become obvious because they are put to the test. Here nobody is worried about getting out of church at 12:15 sharp because they have more important things to do...instead they linger just to love on eachother. Thats what I want to bring to my home, my church family. That's where Jesus is. God is love and somehow that slips away from us and we forget what that means, we forget what God intented love to look like in our lives. I am so incredibly blessed by my church and my family and that's where I want my focus to be. 1 John had changed my heart.

We have been visiting the homes of families whose children are sponsored by si and although we bring them baskets with basic food items, they give us their stories, their hearts, their lives and it's so much more than I could ever give. I work in the schools everyday with children who have nothing in their bellies but still have hearts of love and joy and sometimes it just blows me out of the water.

In love,

allie